‘Puppy Love’

a bag, closely resembling a dog's face
Woof!

It had been easy to fall in love with the cute little bulldog and its goofy overbite. She used to pet it and it followed her everywhere.

But now, with it all being grown up and all, it had gotten complicated.

Sure it would still come along on long walks. Sure it would run through falling leaves but it would also chase its tail, bark at strangers and drag her into all kind of shops. Usually at the most random moments when she did not really need any new shoes.

The scariest thing was, it didn’t realize it was just a bag. It would just sit there, on her lap, staring at her. Drooling, wiggling its tail. Demanding from her to take him out again.

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‘Circumcised Box’

red square box on the street
Porn in Public

Gross. Caught them red handed. Locker and Street quite going at it. Pinned against the wall right there, halfway through the alley.

I guess he isn’t used to exposing himself like that in public.

I’ll say that. He looked rather flushed when I caught them on camera. Street did not blink an eye though, like she is used to having people going up and down on her like that day or night. No shame, and she could’ve shaved.

Zomer Zonder Zonnebril

sunglasses in pieces
Sunglasses break-up.

Om een of andere reden heeft mijn zonnebril vandaag besloten dat ie klaar is met de zomer. Niet echt met een goede reden of excuus in mijn ogen. Ik voelde me verraden. Hij wil ‘meer me-time en zichzelf verder ontwikkelen in het kweken van de perfecte tomaat’. Zijn woorden. Letterlijk.
Even dreigde hij ook nog een claim in te dienen voor ‘die dagen dat ik ingeroosterd was maar last minute niet hoefde komen op te dagen’. Ik heb iets terug geroepen over: ‘voor jou dertig andere zzp’ers’ en ‘lees de kleine lettertjes van je contract onder klimaatverandering, lul’. Daar had ie niet van terug geloof ik. In ieder geval de relatie is definitief stuk nu.

‘Window of Opportunity’

photo 4Was this it? Was this the way he wanted life to take him? This was not the soft, female voice of his navigation system telling him to go left. She told him to go straight ahead, and in a minute she would probably tell him to make a u-turn.

This was his quarter-life crisis whispering in his ear that all the choices he would make would limit his future options. He hit the brakes. Time for indecisive freeze in the middle of the street. He wanted all, so doing nothing was probably the only way to go.

He would bother no-one if he would just stay here for a bit and watched some YouTube.

In an hour he would search his glove-box. Looking for the Google maps of the road less traveled. That path towards his midlife crisis. He’d forgotten that he used to be great at making treasure maps himself, when he was a child. But then again, in those days he still could be a pirate one day and a doctor an hour later.